One of my uncles, Michael, went away for a trip. When he got back to Victoria, he swung by my Grandma's house to say hello and catch up with the family. Walking into the family home that morning, he looked around and saw that the kitchen was clean and there were platters of food on every available surface. My Mom and Aunt were in the kitchen, and he turned to them saying, "there's either a Christening or a funeral, which is it?"
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It turned out to be a funeral. My family often hosted receptions for funerals as we had a huge house, so I grew up with the belief that every funeral was followed by a large celebration of the person's life, and a lot of food! When my Grandma died, I arrived at the house and walked into the kitchen at 7 in the morning and found food already all over the table. I distinctly remember that there was an abundance of food in the house over the next few days- little sandwiches, cold pizza, etc. And the reception we held after her funeral can only be called a party. Everyone was obviously very sad, but we also all comforted each other and wanted to send my Grandma off in style.
Reading the article by Hayden (2009), it strikes me that the one element which he never really discussed as a motivation for an elaborate funeral feast (or ELFF!) was mourning a loved one. He discusses a desire to honour the deceased, but never really delves into what is to me the most obvious reason to hold a large feast and deplete all your resources: love.
Hayden, B. (2009) Funerals as Feasts: Why Are They So Important? Cambridge Archaeological Journal 19:29-52.
Haha, just read your post! Good job on catching the one element that Hayden doesn't talk about in his article: LOVE. Your family stories are a hoot, love your blog Meredith!
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